As anybody who has moved to a new city can tell, the first thing one tries to do is to get a handle on the rental market in the city. Mumbai is no different than New York in many aspects as far as renting a place goes. For expats there are two main options depending on where they work. If one works in South Mumbai, then the areas around Colaba, Walkeshwar, Altamount Road, Peddar Road, Breach Candy, Worli Sea Face, Prabhadevi and may be upto Lower Parel will work. If one works in Bandra Kurla complex or further north, then there is only one choice, Bandra. Now this is the problem is!! Bandra and its poor cousin Khar are supposedly upscale areas.

Somebody had told me once that South Mumbai was like the Upper East Side and Bandra was like the Upper West Side of New York City. I work near the international airport which is in the north of the city. So I decided to live in Bandra which is about 12 kilometers from my office. I love the upper west side and thus, was looking forward to finding a place in Bandra.

My first visit to Bandra was enough of an eye opener that any comparison to the upper west side was at best probably concocted in the mind of an over imaginative Bandra property owner of which there are many. Bandra is no upper west side!!! There arent many apartments that do not over look a slum. The sea smells of sewage!! And there is construction going on every where!!! The roads are hideously narrow with cars parked on both sides.

As I was mentally recalibrating expectations of Bandra, my friendly realtor said that if my budget was higher I could get a non-smelly, non slum facing apartment with a sea view. He wanted me to spend around $5000 to $8000 per month for a non-smelly, non slum facing apartment with a sea view. Here I am a single guy looking for a 2 bedroom apartment and I was willing to shell out $2500 per month on rent which I thought was already to high. I said what the hell, and told the realtor let's go looking for a palace!!!

The first 'palace' he took me to was a fourth floor apartment supposedly owned by a B-grade bollywood actor. Now it was a decent apartment and if you stretched your neck out, you could see the sea a bit.  The catch was that the bathroom was open. The main bathroom that is attached to the bedroom had walls of transparent glass.  I am definitively not an exhibitionist nor do I have any kinky tendencies unfortunately, so having anybody watch me poop or pee is not my idea of fun!!! So out went the actor's sex pad as my oasis in noisy, smelly environs of upscale Mumbai.

After many such hits and misses, my realtor got fed up with me. He politely but definitely insulted me by saying that I am too low end for him and that I should be looking at Lokhandwala at my budget. Now Lokhandwala is an upcoming suburb further north of Bandra. People in Bandra think of Lokhandwala folks as their poor cousins. But if one looks at it objectively, Lokhandwala is where all the food and entertainment options are. Barring a few restaurants, Bandra is low on food and entertainment quotient. And Bandra folks are mostly old folks.  But before you think I am completely anti-Bandra, I must say Bandra has a few delightful places. Olive is a restaurant where the food is exquisite. I even like DaVinci and Out of the Blue. The over-priced pani-puri at Elcos is a must have. Also, if you need a good hotel near the airport but not next to the airport, the Taj Land's End is a fabulous hotel. The views from the hotel (well, depending on the room you get) are spectacular and so are the many restaurants in the hotel. So before your corporate travel geeks put you at the Hyatt, get them to book you at this hotel.

So I am off to looking at apartments in Juhu. Juhu is the next major suburb after Bandra/Khar. More on this on my next blog.